Drunk Venetians pushing each other into canals

Our Latin assignment for today was the transcript of a case brought before a judge just outside of Venice. Its pretty funny. I have adapted the Latin somewhat freely since its just a scribe feverishly copying down what was said and not really pausing for sentence breaks:

Nicolas Furlanus the miller, having been interrogated by oath concerning the ruckus he had with Jacobino of Maiorbo the miller and with Rolando his servant, answered and said that when he had come along with his father and his brother from the house of Sadamato the tavernkeep at the same time with said Jacobino and Rolando. They all attempted to enter one gondolla at the same time, and Rolando remained over on the riverbank. When Batholomeus the servant of Stephano the miller and John the servant of that same father Nicolas attempted to enter the same boat, Roland attempted to push those two into the water. Said servants decided not enter the boat but instead went across on the land, and said Rolando then entered the boat. When they were in the middle of the canal, Dominico the father of Nicolas began to swear and to tell Rolando that he had done badly because he wished to throw the servants into the water. Rolando responded that he didn't give a ****. And afterwards when they had come to the landing at St. Peter, Jacobino began to speak against Dominico the father of Nicolas that he would defend Roland from him (Dominico) and also from thirty greater men on land and then he threatened that same father. To these words Nicolas responded and said to Jacobino:
"If you make any more low-born comments at my dad, I'll hit you so hard in the nose that you'll feel it for a whole month."
And so with all going at the same time through the street, Jacobino walked a bit ahead of the others, and he wrapped his arm with his cloak [dun dun dun, this means that crap's about to go down] and he drew out a bread knife against Nicolas and made three strikes at him with the bread knife, which Nicolas evaded. He went to the other side and the others forced him into the middle. After, Nicolas crossed over and seized a pole that was over by the riverbank and smacked Jacobino on his mantle covered arm. Jacobino then ran to his father's house for the purpose of seizing arms, just as the father and brother were thinking, and likewise the father and brother went to a woodshed and each grabbed a piece of wood for...whatever reason [basically, they grabbed some firewood to use as clubs, but aren't admitting to it. "Hey guys, lets go grab some firewood as...a gift...for Jacobino..."]. And then Petrus Lando came over and made them stop fighting.

So, that was part of the assigment. The rest of it was the other guys' testimony, which was entertainingly different in sections. Mostly, they just hit each other more, actually succeed in tossing each other into the canal, and call each other "rustic." Funny stuff if you've been stuck reading a crazy hard sermon for three weeks...